"Toots"

Here's Baby Victoria, or as I like to call her "Toots." "Auntie Susan" gave her a good burping and she was ready for snoozy time. It was great to see her again at 9 weeks old even though the circumstances under which I saw her weren't the best. This picture was taken at her Aunt Tamara's funeral in Wimberly, TX. We will all miss Tamara, and Victoria was a nice diversion for all the family to see. Hopefully if her daddy stays on the ball I will be able to post more pictures of "Toots" soon.

Signing Back In

After a month and a 1/2 silence I think it's now time to "break the silence." Things have been going pretty well at work. It's been really busy but all-in-all I can't really complain. I've been to Los Angeles, Las Vegas and San Antonio. Granted the trip to San Antonio was only for a day and it wasn't for a very pretty reason, but I've done some traveling. I'm back in the grind of work now and starting to get everything together to work on my BSN. Oh joy right ??? Ya should probably have my head examined for that one, but I think in the long run it's the right thing to do. My grandmother's birthday is in 4 weeks. She's going to be 90 years old. Guess I'd better get the ball rolling if I'm going to catch up to all that she's done. Whoo...Anyways, back to my life as a blogger. Hopefully subsequent posts won't be as "blah" as this one. Onward I go.

Men are From Mars.....Women are from Venus

No, I didn't break down and buy the book to read about the differences between men and women and how to bridge the gap, but maybe I need to. It seems like my conversations with the opposite sex have a huge disconnect going on. None of the words permeate the barrier that lies between me and the he's. It really kinda stinks because I'm ending up spending all of my time either apologizing for one thing or another or just not talking. It's CRAP. Maybe there's something going on with the whole pull of the full moon that's going to happen tomorrow or something. I honestly don't know, but if the planets can orbit around the same sun surely they can interact together at one point or another. Even if it's just a passing wave as their orbiting the same point. Who knows...reminds me of an old saying from Astroworld..."Stoned is the way of the walk, sparkle, sparkle." Ya...very "star wars-ish" makes me think I should just give into the force and let life go on.

Serenity Now...

I'm not sure I actually remember where the saying came from, but I remember someone screaming it on some t.v. sitcom. "Serenity now, Serenity now!!!" Today, after working a 16 hour shift, which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, I went to the gym for a swim. It was rough going since I haven't actually been working out for that long but I made it. As a reward I allowed myself 10 minutes of indulgence in the hot tub. During my stint in the hot tub I couldn't help but stare at the "foam" from the bubbling up of the water. It was then that I was taken back to being on the cruise in May with all the "foam" trailing behind the boat from the motors. It was a great rememberance and a little bit of "serenity" from the madness that is everyday life. Here's the picture of the "foam."

Is it time for vacation yet?

3 1/2 weeks after coming back from Cabo San Lucas I'm ready to go on vacation again. I guess that's because it's saturday night, and I'm at work dealing with psychos on my weekend off. Yep, you read that right. It's my weekend off yet I'm here on a Saturday dealing with psycho people. It's all good, because as it turns out this is overtime for me, but at the same time. Even my overtime payrate doesn't compensate for the madness that usually ensues when I come into work on a Saturday. Yesterday, friday was hellacious enough that I don't really think I needed to come in to endure the madness today, but alas I was helping a friend out. Sometimes I think I should have my head examined for helping people out. I came in today as a favor to someone and I can't help but feel like I'm being stabbed in the back. Oh well, as Alanis would say, "You live, you learn..." I'm beyond ready for my trip to LA.

Wrong Number...

Don't you just hate it when people call you and they've got the wrong number? It's a nuisance to most, but to nightshift workers it's especially horrible. You're sleeping during the day to keep yourself from falling asleep when you're at work and the rest of the world is sleeping and you're having to deal with people dialing the wrong number. I can handle an isolated incident every now and then, but when they hang up and call right back several times as if the number has magically changed that drives me nutso. Thus I will try to survive tonight with less sleep since I had a 'wrong number' dialing me today. ARGH...

"Hakuna Matata"

Okay, so I'm not quite sure if that's the spelling of the phrase Timon and Pumba coined, but it seems to apply to life in general. Since it's the summer it is my new phrase of choice. Supposedly, it means "no worries." I think it's a good phrase and following Kristy and I going to see the Lion King last night it now applies to everything. I think it's just easier than stressing out over something you can't really control anyways. Whoo...Hakuna Matata...I'm glad I don't have to go to work tonight though, because then I'd truly have to see if this way of thinking actually works or if it's just my mantra of the moment.

"Hakuna Matata"

Okay, so I'm not quite sure if that's the spelling of the phrase Timon and Pumba coined, but it seems to apply to life in general. Since it's the summer it is my new phrase of choice. Supposedly, it means "no worries." I think it's a good phrase and following Kristy and I going to see the Lion King last night it now applies to everything. I think it's just easier than stressing out over something you can't really control anyways. Whoo...Hakuna Matata...I'm glad I don't have to go to work tonight though, because then I'd truly have to see if this way of thinking actually works or if it's just my mantra of the moment.

"Crazy"

Ever have one of those days where everything you're feeling and/or going through can be summarized by a song. Maybe not some "popular" song that's playing on the radio right now, but something that sticks to you and speaks to you at some particular moment that could be from even before you were born. Today I feel like "Crazy" sung by Patsy Cline sums up many of the emotions that I've been going through over the past couple of weeks. Maybe it's hormones or maybe it's the misalignment of some planets or something or other or maybe it's just a mood. I guess that's one of the luxuries we have about being human. Moods are allowed. Granted excessive deviations in mood are usually not tolerated well, but on the whole moods can change and while people may feel there is a deviation from the norm you're allowed to run the gambit of emotions before someone says something. So maybe now and then it's not all wrong to feel a little "Patsy Cline Crazy." I guess as long as you don't take it out on everyone around you or commit to something too serious it's all good. Well, I guess this "CRAZY" better be getting ready to go to work.

Expectations

Webster defines this as "Eager anticipation."

With that being said...Sometimes expectations are the fuel to our fires. We expect to get a new job and it drives us to work harder to make a better impression. We expect to finish school so we do it without questioning and then when it's over there's a sense of loss and longing to go back to what we had before. I think the same is true in relationships. We set forth expectations that "society" has put forth for us of how a relationship should "feel," and how roles should be played out by members in the relationship only to be thwarted by reality. When reality comes into play the expectations have to be thrown out the window, and sometimes it's the exact throwing of the expectations out the window that leads one to dissapointment of further expectations.

It's true for all relationships...friendships, lovers, family members, and even those that you've known all your life that don't fall into any of the above categories. I guess the point of sanity is when you can balance yourself between the expectations and reality. It's a constant process and the only way to continue through it is to truly throw expectations out the window and just attempt to live. One day at a time...one foot in front of the other and keep going. No matter what life throws at you or how often you want to throw your hands up in the air and scream bloody murder. Just don't become so jaded towards expectations that you forget to love and love with your whole heart. Love your friends, love your neighbors, love your family and most of all love yourself because without it you might forget all about expectations.

Happy Anniversary!

My favorite "new parents" are celebrating their 4 year anniversary today. Happy Anniversary !!! Here's another picture of the "happy family" only hours after Ms. Victoria was born.

She's Here...

My newest "niece" is here. Baby Victoria came early on Friday. We're all very glad that she's here. Well, I'd be more glad if she were here in Houston, but LA will do for now. Can't wait to go and see her.

Call in the Exorcist

After two days of work with one not too busy and the other one so busy I had zero time to sit down on an entire 12 hour shift other than when I was eating...I have come to the conclusion that one of the rooms needs an exorcist. It does not matter whom goes into this room, because once they're in there they instantly become the devil. The call bell goes ringing off the hook no matter what you do, give or help them with and the nurse instantly becomes the worst nurse ever. This has been going on for a week now and I am convinced that the room needs to have the demons cast out or something. Bring me the Holy Water....

Under Construction

So, it's been a long while...a really long while since I've updated this thing. Perhaps it's because I went on a cruise to the bahamas with Edward and since then I've basically been doing nothing but working. Whoo...whoever said life after school was over was great....was RIGHT. Yep, didn't see that one coming did ya ?? Anyways, we're off to Cabo at the end of the week. I'm psyched and I'm still contending that this Blog is "under construction" until I have the discipline to write it on a daily basis. If you really want something great to read. Check out http://trent.blogspot.com He's awesome at daily Celebrity updates. Whoo....Oh ya, here's a picture of my toes in the bahamas.

My First Solo Day...

Last night was my first "solo" day as an R.N. Okay, so I've pretty much been doing things by myself etc, but last night was the first night the actual 'safety net' wasn't at work. It was weird and kinda lonely all at the same time, but as the night progressed into early a.m. I began to feel more and more comfortable being on my own. I don't know if I could ever truly thank my preceptor for all that he's taught me, but I guess by doing it and doing it well at work I can show him that you really can teach anyone :) Ah...happy, cool fun stuff as Jane used to say at RHI in California. Today's day 2 of 'soloville'

Happy Birthday Kristy!!!

Yep, that's right this is now becoming the 'birthday' blog. Happy Birthday to my best bud Kristy, who inches closer to my "ripe old age" for a few months before I jet off into the next decade and leave her behind to finish enjoying her 20's. Ah 20's the good old days. Then again, the more I think about it the less I think my 20's were that great. Don't get me wrong the whole 21 thing was pretty good and living in LA in my mid-20's was pretty good, but past that it kinda stunk. Then again maybe that's because I couldn't really figure out what I wanted to do with myself until I was 26 and now at 29 I'm finally working in my chosen profession and can see the earning potential ahead of me. Oh well, today isn't about me. Happy 27th Cookie !!! Yep, you'll always be "cookie" to me.

Happy Birthday Kasey Kahne !!!

Happy Birthday to Kasey Kahne..My FAVORITE NASCAR NEXTEL driver, and the winner of yesterday's Samsung/RadioShack 500. It was an amazing race and I got to sit through every minute of it with my good friends Kristy, Carrie and her husband Bill. I don't think I should be calling them friends b/c they're more like family to me than anything else. I have to thank Bill and Kristy for getting my interest in NASCAR started and kudos to my boy for winning the race. After watching Kasey finish 2nd three times in his first season (at all the races I went to that year) and watching him DNF in Bristol last year, this win was definitely worth the wait. I'm very glad he won yesterday and wish him the best of luck with his birthday an enjoying the rest of the season. Oh ya, he's now an honorary Texan. I'd be happy if he stayed :)

Change of Heart.

I guess you could say I've had a change of heart. I thought that working with a certain individual would cause me challenges and grief, but I'm happy to report that after two nights in the trenches we seem to be getting along better than ever. I guess it jus goes to show that the competitiveness of nursing school and the madness that it creates aren't "real life" experiences. I'm happy I've got my new compadre there with me to go through all the craziness. Afterall, safety in numbers right ??? As for the rest of the population....take care of yourselves and each other. There have been way too many ER visits in the last 72 hours in the entire city of Houston.

Challenges

Now that nursing school is over and the boards are over and I'm an actual R.N. I always knew there would be challenges, but I don't think I quite expected them to come this quickly. In order to protect identities and to save face I'll leave out the exact situation. Let's just say that all prayers are welcome as I face the challenges that this evening will bring for me. Thanks everyone for being there for me and hopefully your thoughts and prayers will continue to lift me up.

Vacation

It's official. I'm on vacation now. Melissa and I snuck off to SoCal for a short weekend jaunt. It's good though b/c I think we both needed to get away from the madness and the "drama" that is orientation right now. More updates to come.

It's Official...

I'm happy to report that I have now entered the ranks of being a Registered Nurse. No more slacking off as a student or proclaiming that I am just a "GN." Now it's time to truly show them what I've got. I have to say when I went to work on Friday night I honestly didn't feel any different about being an RN versus a GN versus an SPN. It pretty much all feels the same, but now I guess it's the added responsibility and accountability that I'm supposed to have over myself that makes it truly different. Anyways, now that I'm an RN I think it's time to take a vacation already. Get away from the chaos that is orientation and take a break.

NCLEX...Hmmmmmm

So, it's Monday the 13th and I took my NCLEX today. Well, Melissa and I took it this a.m. to be exact. It was um, interesting for lack of a better word. I wouldn't exactly call it a "cinch" but some of the questions dumbfounded me b/c they had absolutely nothing to do with nursing. My "magic number" was 76. It's one of those things that makes you go hmmmmm, because you can pretty much get any number between 75 and 265 and pass or fail. Ya...hmmm, still makes me wonder. How exactly did this test measure whether or not I'm fit to be a nurse? Let's hope it picked up on the fact I've been working in an ER for a year and my preceptr feels like I'm ready to be a nurse and I've graduated from an accredited school of nursing so that should be good enough to pass me. Meanwhile I turn to sleep and prayer in an effort to get through the next 48 hours before I can find out the results. Stay tuned for more updates.

PediCURE...

Studying has been less than stellar this week. I have to say the best studying this far was going to the beach with Melissa on Saturday and cramming before our oscar party on Sunday. Though we did get a bunch of studying done today before our trip to "pedicure" our troubles away. It was really nice to be able to have someone literally scrub our troubles away as we capped off the management questions in our book. Needless to say, I'm feeling like I need to get back to the books despite my desire to throw them out the window. I guess with my newly painted toes it's the least I can do...spend more time cramming. Perhaps I'm over-studying, but I guess I won't know until I confer with my cohorts whom are taking the boards tomorrow. To all of you whom will be taking the boards tomorrow....this pedicure was for you. Good luck. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Studying Schmudying

I hate studying. I think I've hated studying throughout the entire course of nursing school. Yep, I think that I've hated it forever. Even the "all-nighters" that were more about hanging out at IHOP or Waffle House in College Station were not my favorite things to do. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends, but I LOVE my SLEEP more. In honor of trying 'alternative means' to study Melissa and I hit galveston yesterday to study. Surprisingly, we got more studying done freezing our assets off on the beach than I could ever hope to do on my own. So, to that end it's time to "Hit the Books at the Beach." If we were only at the beach in LA to do it :) Alrighty, back to those books I detest so much :)

The End of Nursing School

With nursing school over I'm sort of at a loss for new names for my blog. How about...What's next? I guess that's as far as I can get considering I should be studying for that NCLEX right now and I can't seem to drag myself any further than out of bed in the a.m. So, since I'm not going to get any studying done today I will officially change the name of this blog to What's Next ?? Chronicles of life after Nursing school.

To all my Friends and former Classmates...

I got this in a forward and thought it was very appropriate for the current situation.

"I Wish..."
For you, I wish good health
For you, I wish happiness and peace of mind
For you, I wish success in your personal life and in your career
For you, I wish the vanishing of hard feelings among family and friends
For you, I wish laughter and joy
For you, I wish a strong faith to carry you through the times that are hard
For you, I wish food upon your table and clothes upon your back
For you, I wish a walk in the forest
For you, I wish friendship, honesty, and fidelity with your mate
For you, I wish the hug of a child
For you, I wish the morning dew and sunlight
For you, I wish a bubble bath by candlelight
For you, I wish a good cry
For you, I wish the songs of a bird and a babbling creek
For you, I wish lessons learned so you will not make the same mistakes over and over
For you, I wish quiet times shared with the one you love
For you, I wish the innocence of youth and the wisdom of maturity
For you, I wish the experience of grass beneath your feet
For you, I wish the receipt of joy in simple matters
For you, I wish the fragrance of a rose
For you, I wish a heart that is at home
For you, I wish dancing by moonlight
For you, I wish the pleasure of fishing
For you, I wish a Mother's love
For you, I wish a good nights sleep
For you, I wish the laughter of a child
For you, I wish memories of days gone by
For you, I wish a heart nestled in acceptance with yourself
For you, I wish dancing eyes and a ready smile
For you, I wish compassion and understanding
For you, I wish the appreciation of a hard days work
For you, I wish safety at all times
For you, I wish insight
For you, I wish a spring rain
For you, I wish simplicity
For you, I wish a day of rest
but most of all I wish you love

FINAL

Today was it. My last final of my nursing school career thus far. From this point I can go forth, take the boards, and hopefully being practicing nursing. But first, there must be partying. This weekend it is not only is it mardi gras, but the beach house that we're gonna have is awesome. Whoo....party on boys and girls.

ALMOST...

Today's our last day of clinicals...for real this time. I'm seriously glad today's our last day of nursing school clinicals. Don't get me wrong, you couldn't be a nurse without the clinical experiences, but it gets to the point where you're just "free labor." Those classmates of mine whom work, like I do, feel the squeeze when we're doing clinicals on a unit and we know good and well that we could be getting paid to basically be doing the exact same thing. Now, I am all for building up rapport etc, but why would you choose to work for free at something that someone else is perfectly willing to pay you for ??? Ya...that creates a quandry about this last quarter of nursing school. They're trying to "teach" me how to "manage" multiple patients. Um ya, I've been doing that since January of 2005...Thanks to my experiences in the ER. I guess that's why I'm working there, because I'd rather work there for free "managing patients" than be doing "clinicals" supposedly "learning how to manage patients." Oy veh...we can do anything if we put our minds to it. Hmmm, only 4 more hours to go....whoo...calgon take me away. The end is so near I can almost taste it.

Sleep...

I, like my colleagues, have reached that point in our curriculum where all we really want to do is sleep. The clinicals that are supposed to "transition" us into "real" nurses make us want to take a "big fat nap." The phrase..."big fat nap" was actually coined and probably copyrighted by my classmate EC, but I've stolen it and made it my own. It's thursday...I have no clinicals today, yet I am awakened at 5:30 simply because my body is used to being awake at 5 a.m. to go to clinicals. Thankfully exhaustion won out and I fell back asleep until 8. Ya...8 isn't late enough for my tastes on my day off, and it's especially troubling when I'm supposed to work tonight. That's no bueno. I'm sleepy already...hence perhaps one of the reasons that I had that outbreak of shingles, but enough about sleep. I think I'm going to have to go find some before I have to go and get my SLP points DONE. Read aaron's column this week.....it's good for a laugh (www.aaronkaro.com ).

Mahna, Mahna

I have to give kudos to the Dr. Pepper people for using the Muppets song for their commercial for a drink that has too many flavorst to mention. Thanks to them my colleagues and I were able to take this and turn it into our mantra for the last few months of nursing school. Today was no exception to the whole Mahna, Mahna saga. We were notified to pick up our portfolios A.S.A.P. because some individuals needed to do revisions...LOVELY. Not what you want to hear about your last porfolio because all you really want to do is get out of there. Right ??? RIGHT. Anyways, from there it was off to my current and future job for a mandatory meeting. Thus the Mahna Mahna continues. Seriously though, the highlight was when everyone found out they were going to keep me as an RN when I finish, which is good news for everyone and they all cheered and clapped. NOW as the former Psycho Robbie would say...That is a Cool Feeling. Enough mahna mahna from me...Thanks for listening...or hearing Mahna Mahna.

Celebrities Need Their Sleep

Here I am ending off one of my last weeks of clinicals for nursing school (two weeks left :)), and since we're at the children's hospital they have the tendency to have famous visitors. Yesterday was no exception, Vince Young stopped by to pay the kiddos a visit. The hospital was all "abuzz" you'd think they were giving out free trips to Disneyland or something, but it's good for the kiddos. They were almost more excited than when the dogs came. I love it when they bring the dogs up here by the way, because it gives the staff (and students) a chance to socialize with the puppies. Awww..how fun. Anyways, I went home after a long day of clinicals and after taking my nap and watched the news. Yep, one of my kiddos was on the news. Thus I've now titled him a "celebrity." He is sleeping the a.m. away though. It's kinda cute. This morning when I went in to check on him I asked him for his autograph since he is a celebrity now...It made him laugh. Maybe he'll wake up by noon, because afterall...Celebrities need their sleep.

Starbucks Radom Quotes

Since I've been out of "comission" for almost a week now with the shingles I've also been away from Starbucks coffee for about a week. Needless to say I think I'm faring okay, but the thought of a non-fat peppermint white mocha does sound good right about now. Then again, I would like to be able to sleep tonight. That's kind of a crapshoot right now anyways. It's either the discomfort of the shingles or insomnia keeping me from sleeping recently. Guess I'll try snorking out with a benadryl tonight. Anyways, random Starbucks quote that hit home...

"The Way I See It #49"

"Baking may be regarded as a science, but it's the chemistry between the ingredients and the cook that gives desserts life. Baking is done out of love to share with family and friends to see them smile. -- Anna Olson "

I don't think I could've summed it up better myself, so the next time you're eating one of my cookies remember that all that goes into it.

Ever Wonder...

Ever wonder what happens to someone who is overstressed, overworked, overtired, and overstretched...well, I can tell you. Said person gets the SHINGLES. Why they call them the shingles I have no clue other than they make you want to jump off a roof. The nerve pain and then the rash and then the rash pain and then let's bring back some nerve pain and some more itching is enough to drive a person mad. Other than the fact that our lovely "clinical site" of pediatrics probably had something to do with this nastiness that is on my body. Needless to say for the past 4 days I have been "out of comission." I've been sleeping and trying to keep from going insane from the hurt and madness known as shingles. Today, I'm starting to feel a bit more normal, so that's definitely a good thing. Hopefully there won't be anymore "shingle" updates.

We are the Aggies...BUT

As an Aggie it is very rare that I would throw my support towards UT, but since they were in the National Championship last night against USC I threw caution to the wind and wore my burnt orange. I'm sure my little cousins were ashamed of me because of all the "brainwashing" I've done to them, but as a Texan (and not a supporter of the less than mediocre football team) I had to support the Longhorns. I thought these pictures best personify the true spirit of Aggies in supporting even our biggest rivals.

CISM !?!?!

Well, it's back to the madness known as HBU and even better yet back to the classroom to continue on the CISM madness trail. I'm pleased to inform all of you that I got an "A" on my CISM - Microsoft Word Exam. Whoo...I know you were all holding your breath on that one. Today we're learning to input data into Excel. Are you joking me ??? I know I learned how to do this in high school and that was over 10 years ago. Ya...that shows my age, but I'm okay with that b/c it just reinforces how stupido this is that they're making me take this class. I guess I really shouldn't complain because if they want to average in an "A" on my last 30 hours in college for a class that I took 9 years ago go ahead. It'll look really good when I go to apply for graduate school. Yowsa...anyways, today was "lovely" again at clinicals. We were so bored today that the instructor had to take it upon herself to tell us that she "hoped it would be busier next week for us." I'm sure that's because everytime she came to see us we were talking to someone and/or sitting on our rears typing on the computer. Oh joy of all joys. BTW...yours truly took it upon herself to inform the instructor that this was less than what we wanted to be doing as a group. :) Gotta love me.

Is it just me?

Is it just me or is no one else in school right now? Today was our first day of clinicals and the only "companionship" I feel is that my classmates in other classes are currently having to endure clinicals as well. As for the rest of nursing schools I think they're still on "holiday break." I wish we were still on holiday break. It was really hard to drag myself out of bed this a.m. and not just because I was swamped last night at work and ended up staying a little later than I planned, but because I was faced with the prospect of having to endure clnicals yet again. I don't understand how working in a nursing role and having clnical experiences can be completely different experiences. I think if I ask most of my classmates they will all agree with me that working as a student nurse is great, but when it comes to clinicals we all want to dig in our heels. We only have 50 something more days and it still feels like a really long time. Well, at least there is solidarity in numbers. :)

Happy 2006 !!!

Well it's 2006 now and though the holidays were great I am glad to begin the year when I will graduate from nursing school. With only 54 days left until graduation I know my classmates and I wait with "bated" breath. Anyways, here are some pictures from the party we went to in Austin. Hopefully I will be more "posty" in 2006.